Vector8 Journals

Thursday, August 05, 2004

The Wacky and Wonderful World of Pica

OK it's time to come out and be proud of who I am, I suffer from "Pica" syndrome. What is Pica? I hear you cry. It's a craving for non-food items. Apparently some pregnant women go through similar cravings. My medical friends would probably think I have an eating disorder. I think not.

My craving is for tissues: toilet tissues, napkins, serviettes and kitchen rolls. I hasten to add that I don't eat any old rubbish tissues, they have to be soft. I don't always swallow them, sometimes I just like the sensation of chewing. Don't ask me to get chewing gum? It's not the same thing.

I used to love eating threads and wool but they were a tad problematic as they don't digest and you end up thinking you've got worms, if you catch my drift.

In the final series of the American comedy, Friends, there's an episode where Joey's agent dies. His agent only had two clients: Joey and a guy who eats paper. That was funny to watch as I could so relate, though I don't eat paper, you understand. Joey was about to deliver the eulogy only to discover that his colleague had eaten it. What a hoot!

Why do I have such craving for tissues? I used to eat them as a child and thought I'd grown out of them but the cravings are still with me. Don't know why I love them, I just do. I guess it's another demonstration that "man cannot live by bread alone" i.e. food is not what keeps me alive. I exist because I am.

This is a warning to you beloved friends - if I ever pop round for dinner, you'd better have a side-dish of good quality toilet tissue/napkins for me to snack on.

Adios amigos,

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