Vector8 Journals

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Big Picture, Detail or Both

Have you ever wondered whether the way you process information makes you are a Big Picture type, a Detail type or Both?

Though I can be very analytical, I'm very much a Big Picture type. I read about people experiencing nature and they describe the different feelings, textures, sights and sounds and I think, "gosh, how did you experience all that?" As for me, I go on a walk and I see trees, birds, and flowers. I've tried writing fiction using descriptive narrative. While I was very good at it, it felt like eating someone's cooking and not liking it but you're trying to be polite and not offend your host. Since writing narrative didn't give me joy, I stopped doing it. Besides, it's really not how I see the world. I'm more into abstract ideas. The universe is a huge blob of energy.

Years ago, when I was on a trip to Australia, I was with my boyfriend at the time, who was a Detail kind of guy. I believe he studied zoology or biology at university. I pestered him about what's what. On one of our many walks in the forest I said to him, "Can you hear the sheep?"
"Yes, yes" he sighed. "I can hear the crow."

I've returned from my mission on earth to Planet Vector8. I am having a meeting with the Council of 12. They ask me what earth was like.

"Well, Earth is made up of water, land, animals, birds, nature, people, buildings, various types of transportation and stuff."

The head of the Council of 12 raises his pointy head. "Is that all?" He squeals. (Squealing is how Vector8 beings communicate when they have to). "Surely, there has to be more to earth than that."

"Hmmm! Let me see now." I'm frantically wracking my brain for more details. "I've just remembered. There are lots of red double-decker buses and people with mobile phones."

If I had the belief that I put myself in a situation to learn a lesson, then I would say I chose my mother to test me. My mother is a Detail person. She is also very much into dates and time, while I don't give two hoots about them. The best watch I ever had didn't have any numbers. I would guess what the time was, which was great. The funny thing is I always arrive on time when I have to. I don't wear a watch now but I have a little time piece in my bag. It glares so much that when someone asks me the time, it takes a while for me to tell the second hand from the minute hand. I tend to keep it in my bag. Besides, there are lots of clocks everywhere just in case.

There are times when I need details and when I do, I either check the Internet or ask someone. Besides, there's a part of Me that knows when the buses run and what's in stock at supermarkets, so I don't need to worry about details, I only need to tune in, as and when.

So I guess I'm a Big Picture type. I still love observing people and events. Here are a few:

The other day, I eavesdropped two women discussing a gardener.

"Is he any good?" one said..
"He's a bit of a hack-merchant."

That made me smile. A hack-merchant sounds to me like a con-artist passing himself off as a gardener, and going about hacking every shrub in sight.

In a particular part of North London are two Doner Kebab takeaway shops, directly opposite each other.

One has the sign: "Probably the Best Kebab in the UK."
The other one has a sign: "The Best Kebab on the Planet."

Now tell me, which Kebab shop will you be drawn to? I wonder which shop is more successful. My view is the former attracts more customers because the Brits love underdogs.

I was about to do the vacuum cleaning the other day. I tried to psyche myself up since I don't like any sort of housework. While I was busy suctioning away the fluffs I had a thought. I wonder how the guy who invented it got inspired! I know...this is how it happened.

Picture this, a woman asks her husband for the umpteenth time to clean the carpets. He says he will. She's on her way out. He asks her for a final kiss before she goes out. She says, only if he promises that by the time she gets back the carpet will be clean. They exchange a long snog. When his wife goes out, the man sits staring at the dirt and fluff on the carpet. He's also thinking about the snog he's just had with his wife and a lot more to come later. He has a thought, wouldn't it be nice if I can snog those fluffs off the carpet? Now that's an idea, maybe I could invent a "snogger."

Not long after, the first "snogger" is invented. The inventor and his partner argue over the name. His partner doesn't think people are going to buy something called a "snogger." After much deliberation and brainstorming, the name "snogger" is replaced with "vacuum cleaner." This, in God's honest truth, is how it happened. Humour me will you, I have to amuse myself when I am doing the hoovering!

You know I have double-vision in one eye. I sometimes can't tell whether someone is going or going.

In conclusion, whether you are a Big Picture type or Detail't remember what I was going to say. Probably too much detail.

Have a lovely day,
Love Enocia

For other writings see Vector8 writings

Monday, September 27, 2004


That's an interesting thought, isn't it? ALL THAT YOU SEEK, YOU ALREADY ARE!

What if I reversed it as follows:


Now this second statement sounds ludicrous. Why would anyone want to look for what s/he already has/is. Isn't that what we are doing as humans?

Just a thought.

Love EJ

Friday, September 24, 2004

Surrender to Love

"Of course I’m lazy, I let God handle the details." (Carson Attaway)

"I can of mine own self do nothing." (John 5: 30)
Surrender, that dirty word. How does one surrender? How can I surrender to something I am not even sure exists? “Let go and let God!” Yeah, yeah, but how does it work in practice? Hmmm!

I can only speak from experience, naturally.

The way I see it, I have a thought to do something. The thought comes from God-Self. I only need to let things happen. The thing is, I’ve been spoiled by metaphysics and stories of miracles, where you expect something to pop up in front of you. The problem with having this fixed expectation is that it has a tendency to prevent infinite other ways things can happen. Since the ways I know are the old tried and tested ways, my only choice is to stay open to other possibilities.

I have observed that there is no waiting involved. The moment the intent is sent out, each moment is working towards fulfilling that goal. So any thought or urge is part of the goal. Here’s an example of letting the unexpected happen.

The most memorable birthday I have ever had started with the thought: “I want to have a memorable birthday.” I also wanted my friends, who had never met, to get on. (That was when I used to celebrate birthdays). I planned to meet my friends in a pub (bar) and then head off to a particular restaurant. The only snag is I couldn’t remember the name of the pub. I described where it was and said it had a “moon” in the title. I arrived pretty early at the pub to greet my guests. Much to my annoyance, there was neither a “moon” nor a “star” in the title. How could I have got it so wrong? How were my friends going to find it? In those days, mobiles were few and far between.

A few bewildered looking friends trickled in. We waited for the others to show. In the end, I resigned myself to the fact that the rest of my friends weren’t going to make it. When we arrived at the restaurant, the rest of the gang was there. It turned out that the ones who couldn’t find the pub had headed for the restaurant. They were able to bond over my error. I was Public Enemy Number 1. My friends teased me about getting the pub title wrong and wouldn’t let me live it down.

As far as I was concerned, I got my wish. It was a memorable day and my friends had a really good time. Would I have been able to arrange this? No. But by trusting in the process and doing what I was inspired to do, all went according to plan.

I believe it was Intent that was the driving force. It was Intent that arranged events the way they happened. Intent originates in silence.

Don Juan puts it this way:

"He said (Don Juan) that choice, for warrior-travelers, was not really the act of choosing, but rather the act of acquiescing elegantly to the solicitations of infinity.

"Infinity chooses," he said. “The art of the warrior-traveler is to have the ability to move with the slightest insinuation, the art of acquiescing to every command of infinity." (The Active Side of Infinity, Carlos Castaneda, p. 182)
In other words, it was Infinity who wanted me to have fun; and it was Infinity’s idea of fun (for me) to create the scene. Infinity worked through my thoughts and my friends. This, to me, is surrender.

Note that there was a point during the evening when I felt annoyed at myself for giving my friends the wrong pub name. My emotional state did not stop events from unfolding, because I surrendered and let things happen. Believe me, I was grateful for the few who had turned up to the pub; I would have had fun, regardless.

The path of “Love” involves trust to such an extent when I trust that my acts are being orchestrated by Infinity. I have seen too many examples to doubt the process. Surrender takes away fretting. Things either happen instantly or unfold as a process. Either way, I let things happen.

I surrender to Love.

Love Enocia

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

When Life Imitates Mosaic Art

“The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun.” (Ecclesiastes 1: 9)

“I promise you, I have no idea how I do it. It just happens.” (Uri Geller)
I had a thought yesterday that life is like mosaic art, forever in a process of creation. I had an idea to go browsing at a particular bookshop. There is a bigger branch in Oxford Street and a smaller branch down the road, which in my view has more comfortable chairs. What swung it for me was the smaller branch was only a few doors away from a shop where I could get a bar of chocolate. You always have to follow your joy in all matters.

At the bookshop I picked up a biography of Uri Geller by Jonathan Margolis. Geller is a man I find very interesting. He is renowned for bending spoons, with his mind and other telekinetic activities. I looked around for a comfy chair but they were all taken. I had an idea that I should walk to the other side of the floor. I found a vacant chair, the type I liked. I read for about an hour, had a shut-eye, then my attention was drawn to some books on the table in front of me. Someone had left four books about mosaic art. I picked up one called “The Mosaic Sourcebook.” It’s incredible how you only need to put out the intent, for the universe to rearrange itself to match that intent!

I believe the way the universe rearranges itself can be compared to mosaic art. The artist puts bits of material together to create a new form. According to the mosaic art books, you can use shards of glass, pottery, ceramics, terracotta, beads…the list is endless. It’s exactly like creation when your intent calls upon the building forms to create anew. My skin reminds me of mosaic art, where the cells can rearrange themselves according to my beliefs.

From what I got from browsing the mosaic art books, there are four processes involved in creating this kind of art:

First, you need a template. You need to have an idea what you’re working with. Are you creating a mosaic cat, or a mug? You need to be very specific.

Second, you need the right material to create the mosaic images.

Third, you need to have the knowledge of how to work with the material and how to arrange the fragments to create the final image.

Fourth, you need to trust in the process; the process takes as long as it takes.

In the same way, as the Inner Voice tells me, to create one needs a template. For instance if you’re going to create the life you want you need a template to work with. We usually understand the original template (or blueprint) to be our God-self, who is perfection, love, beauty, truth, bliss, abundance etc. In addition to this, I also have an idea about the type of idea of God I wish to project as my individual presence, which includes physical attributes. The template remains the same. I like to think there is an Enocia blueprint I am working with.

It is also my understanding that within the realm of infinite potential, there are blueprints for every form. Let’s take the domestic dog as an example. We now have many types of dog pedigrees. While dogs come in all shapes and sizes, a dog is a dog is a dog. In other words, the doggy blueprint is the same - a four legged creature that barks and likes sniffing at things. There are also templates for forms we can’t even conceive, yet they exist as ideas. No wonder Jesus said “with God all things are possible!”

The materials needed to create is of course an important ingredient. You call forth the substance of infinite potential and command that it fills the template you have in mind.

Another part of creation is the intelligence that knows how to put things together. This intelligence also knows what the final product looks like.

I believe there is the One Intelligence creating, which I call Infinity. It is Infinity that holds the blueprint/ideas for all forms; it is Infinity that is the substance of all forms; and it is Infinity that is the intelligence creating all forms. Since Infinity is all knowing, all you need to do is trust that It knows what It is doing.

Since I am a “child” of Infinity, it means it is I who is creating the forms. I am the art, the artist and the process involved. While I may not always be fully conscious of the process from a human perspective, I only need to trust in the process and let it happen.

I am Mosaic Art,

For other writings see Vector8 writings

Saturday, September 11, 2004

The Lost Art of Forgetting

It’s really late, just gone after 12 midnight and I’m listening to my mother trying to decide whether she should go to bed or not. She has a ritual where, if she has a snooze in the afternoon, she finds she stays awake till late. She is trying to recall whether she slept earlier, as she is very much awake. She remembers she was out in the afternoon and so she couldn’t have had a snooze, therefore she must be sleepy. I could have reminded her she was playing mind games but it was late, and I needed to be in silence and not get into a discussion. Besides, I am the last one to talk about mind games.

About a month ago I bought a new brand of deodorant. The first time I sprayed it I started sneezing, coughing and my nose was all bunged up. I reminded myself that I am Spirit and nothing can affect me, blah, blah. It took about five minutes for the coughing and sneezing to clear up. The next day the same thing happened…and the next…and the next. You could argue that I have an allergic reaction to this deodorant, but I know it is impossible. An allergic reaction is a state of mortal mind.

One day I used the deodorant, did my make-up and was about to leave when I remembered I hadn’t used the deodorant. The Voice kindly reminded me that I had already used the deodorant. But there was no reaction! Was I cured? The Voice said there had been no reaction because I had forgotten. The next day it was the same, I sprayed, did what I had to do and was about to spray again when I remembered I had already sprayed. Up till today it’s the same, I have no reaction to the deodorant.

Forgetting is the key. While one doesn’t entirely forget, the action is simply dissolved into the formlessness - the sea of forgetfulness - along with other memories, which emerge as and when needed. My mother’s example was that she had forgotten she had been out that afternoon and was about to stay awake until she remembered she never had a kip. It just shows that on the one hand, I am the source of every obstacle; while on the other hand, I am the solution to every problem.

How does one practise the art of forgetting? In my opinion, it is about staying in the present, being 100% in the moment. Since we measure moments in seconds, there are 86,400 moments in every 24 hours/1 day. Imagine how many moments we have to play with! I fill every moment with 100% of my presence.

If I am on a bus watching the world go by, I do it 100%.
If I am in silence, I am in silence 100%.
If I am deep in thought, I am thinking 100%.
If I am reminiscing about what I love, I am reminiscing 100%.
If am writing, I am 100% focused on what I am writing about.

I move from action to action, moment to moment; forgetting the last moment and delving into the new moment. Some actions last for 3 moments while others last a thousand moments, it all depends. When I am fully in the moment doing whatever brings me joy, there is no room to fret and create chaos that would make me sick or anxious or whatever.

The other day I was aware I wasn’t fully present. I was waiting for a bus and it was late. I got a bit anxious about it being late etc and found I wasn’t relaxed. Then I realised what I was doing. I experienced all of me while I was waiting and felt immense joy. A woman beside me grumbled about how awful the bus service was. I heard and acknowledged her but I was too busy being mySelf to get involved. As the Voice reminds me,

“When you are not fully present, you experience a sense of lack. When you are fully present, there is no room for lack. As the outer and inner are one, the fullness of who you are is created in the outer. There is therefore no need to worry about a thing as you know that all is well.”

For me, being in the present, experiencing all that I am in every moment, is my way of forgetting.

Isn’t it time all of us remembered the lost art of forgetting?

I am Forgetfulness,

For other writings see Vector8 writings