Vector8 Journals

Thursday, October 14, 2004

My Own Private Everest

Yesterday, I had a wonderful experience.

I woke up with symptoms of a flu: coughing, sneezing and feeling like “death warmed up.” Since I know the flu has no reality in my universe, I decided to go with the experience. The last time I was laid up like this, I made a huge shift in consciousness. I wondered whether I was giving myself this opportunity for a reason. Whatever happened, I was going to have fun.

I spent the day lying on the sofa in the living room all wrapped up. I expected to meditate and feel well enough to go out in the afternoon but I didn’t have the energy. My mother was out so I could relax without interruptions. The Inner Voice even told me what time I should expect my mother back, which was spot on.

It’s an interesting place to be, to feel physically sick and yet untouched by the experience. It was great to watch afternoon soaps which I haven’t done in ages.

I did some meditation. While I was in that state, I couldn’t feel my body. The moment I shifted perspective and went back to watching television, I was back to sneezing and coughing.

When my mother returned, she offered me tablets and cough mixture but I declined. I had to try what I believed to be true. Aha, beliefs! Was it possible I had created this experience to test out my self-belief?

Later, I watched a documentary about a man who was given a challenge to climb Mount Everest. He had no experience in mountaineering and had four months to train and acclimatise to the mountains before making his attempt. As part of his preparation, he had a session with a sports psychologist, specialising in Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), to get him mentally prepared. (It is a technique I am very much aware of as I am an NLP practitioner). From base camp he and his colleagues moved to another camp at a higher altitude, but he couldn't cope with altitude sickness. He returned to the former base camp. He figured he would attempt the next level when he was feeling better. He made a second attempt and he wasn’t successful. He made his third and final attempt but he believed his body wasn’t letting him continue. He gave up. The other mountaineers interviewed discussed what drives a mountaineer to succeed. They said mountaineers are considered mad and selfish. What drives them is a strong desire to fulfil their objective, even if you end up dead.

It seems to me that the man didn’t have the belief required to climb Everest. Those who keep returning again and again to Everest have transcended the belief that the body is one’s identity; they have a belief that Mind is their identity.

As I pondered over the documentary, I realised that mountaineers are like spiritual seekers. While they do it from a physical perspective, it all boils down to the same thing. It is a mountaineer’s self-belief that drives him to achieve his goal. I have no desire to climb Everest yet I am climbing my own personal Everest by pushing myself to achieve mental freedom.

Back to my physical state. As I lay in bed I saw a "picture" of myself the next morning in front of the computer typing away. I knew that this future Self was the driving force and would get me out of bed the next day. I also had a realisation that this 24 hour flu was giving me an opportunity to enjoy different experiences, to test out my self-belief.

One meditation I had practised during the afternoon was to merge the universe into one. All I have to do is think of the state of oneness, which I call the LMML Zone, and I’m there. (LMML stands for Luck, Miracles, Magic and Love). The moment I thought of the LMML Zone, my body, the chair, the pillow, the duvet, the room, the television were merged into one. Since I was one with all, I couldn’t feel anything. Through this technique I realise the principle: All there is is Love.

Next, I reduced my world to silence. As silence I could feel nothing because nothing cannot have sensations. I was the observer, the watcher behind all forms.

In the middle of the night I decided I’d had enough of this game. I dismissed the idea of being sick as nothing. I woke up this morning feeling a lot better, yet I didn’t feel like getting up. I saw the future Me typing away. I dragged myself out of bed and got ready. My mother suggested I rested for another day. I told her I was perfectly OK. When I was a child I used to love playing with magnets. I would hover the magnet over paper clips or safety pins and move them without contact. This morning, I felt like a magnet - my future Self - was moving my safety pin of a body into action. Just before I was about to cross the road my bus arrived. I didn’t feel like running for it. Later, I saw the bus I had missed down the road. It had broken down. Just as well.

I have now merged in with the Me I had observed yesterday and I am feeling perfect, just perfect. The experience was a demonstration that it is the Thought-form or Idea of perfection that drives me on, not the physical body. Just like it is the Idea of conquering Everest that drives those mountaineers to return again and again. They do not all share the same beliefs, however. There are mountaineers who believe one can climb Everest without oxygen and they succeed; while others believe they can reach the top by determination and lots of oxygen. According to their beliefs so be it.

I am not a body, I am the Idea of perfection, according to my belief of perfection. It is this Idea that does the work. Idea is not physical, nor has it ever been physical. Idea was never born nor can Idea ever die. Idea is omnipresent and always preparing the way, doing whatever is necessary, to achieve my goal. Idea is also the end-result of my goal. All I, the human form, need do is show up.

What a wonderful day! What a wonderful life!

All my love,