Vector8 Journals

Sunday, May 08, 2005

The Love That Wants Nothing in Return

"For our God is a consuming fire." (Hebrews 12: 29)
"God is light, and in him is no darkness at all." (1 John 1: 5)
"God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him." (1 John 4: 16)
You could have all wisdom; you could be the most successful (in human terms) man or woman in the world; you could be the richest person; but without Love, it all means nothing. I have searched for this Love in relationships, at work and play, even in spirituality, but none have come close to this Love I am about to describe.

What is this Love? To put it simply, I am the Love I seek.

When I want to experience this Love, I imagine myself hugging me, the human form; but the Me doing the hugging is much larger. Another way I express this Love is I see the human self as very tiny, and the Me that is Love like a lamp shade that covers the human completely. The Love I feel is so intense that all ailments or resistance melt away.

As the Love that I am, I don't care about human knowledge. I don't care about what the human self has done in the past. I don't care whether the human self is good or bad in human terms. I, Love, am all consuming and melt away all thoughts the human self has into silence.

The Love that I am is like sitting next to a warm fire and feeling so comfortable that you lose yourself in the warmth only to discover you are the fire.

The Love that I am is like being in silence i.e. having no thoughts and you get so lost in the silence that you forget yourself as a human and know nothing but silence.

For many years I have been interested in healing. I've studied several healing techniques. I can dream up new cures for different ailments but the simplest cure of all is Love.

A few hours ago on one of my bus journeys, I felt pins and needles on my body which hurt, I get this from time to time. I swapped states and knew myself as Love. I hugged the human self and repeated "I love you," over and over again until the human self calmed down and the pain dissolved into nothing.

As I was waiting for my bus I heard a woman complaining about the appalling service and how she'd been waiting a long time. I was also waiting for the same bus but I was using the time to hug myself. I felt this uncontrollable urge to hug the woman but I didn't want to frighten her. I moved towards her and engaged her in a conversation about buses. She told me where she'd been and where she wanted to go to. In my own way, listening to her was giving her a hug.

Sometimes I feel as if I'm going to burst with all this Love. I would like to share this Love in relationships, to love just because it feels so good to Love the way I am being Love. I guess this website is an outlet for me to share the Love that I am.

God is Love and all is God. This Love is all consuming and can feel very intense if you're not used to a Love that doesn't judge or want anything in return. I believe this is the Love people seek in friendships and relationships and in life experiences.

I am Home.
I am truly the Love I seek.

All My Love,
Enocia

See Portrait of Your Mighty I Am Presence