Vector8 Journals

Saturday, June 25, 2005

The Real Self

The wheels on the bus go round and round.
round and round.
round and round.
The wheels on the bus go round and round,
all through the town!

The people on the bus go up and down.
up and down.
up and down.
The people on the bus go up and down,
all through the town! The Wheels on the Bus
"The Spirit of God, I realized, is exhaustless Bliss" Autobiography of a Yogi
We say God is Love? What is Love? Love is not a feeling but a consciousness that is devoid of thoughts, concepts and ideas. It is an acceptance of all that is. Another word for Love is inexhaustible bliss.

"So, how was your weekend?" your friend asks you.
"Great, thank you."
"What did you do?"
"Well, on Saturday morning, I woke up at 7 o'clock then I went back to sleep. When I woke up again I looked at the clock and it was 9 o'clock. Then I went to the bathroom to have a pee. Then I brushed my teeth. Then I cooked myself some English breakfast, the whole works: sausage, eggs, bacon, baked beans, two slices of toast, a cup of sweet tea and some orange juice. After I had finished eating I did the washing up. Then I..."
"Whoa! Can you skip the details and tell me what you really got up to?"
"I am telling you what I did. Then I went to run myself a bath. While I was running the bath the phone started ringing so I.."
"Look, forget it."
"But I haven't described the whole weekend yet."
"You're alright. I'm sure you had a lovely weekend."

Imagine if I described my days in this way, people will get bored. You have to embellish it to make your life sound exciting and meaningful. When I embellish my life, I am dreaming.

The universe is a sequence of events that go round and round like the wheels on a bus. Incidentally, I have a thing about wheels. I observe wheels on cars, buses and lorries and how some wheels have different number of spokes, and how you can't see the spokes when the car is moving. When I'm in an analytical frame of mind, I wonder how fast a car has to move for me not to see it.

Experiences are dream events that move on like images on a projector screen. My real self and the self of all, observes every sequence without judgment. Judgment is when one attributes meanings to an experience. You watch a movie and you describe the movie from your perspective. But if you were describing the movie as your real self, you will simply describe everything that happened in every sequence without analysis. As the real self you will never get a job as a film critic.

When I interact in an event or an experience I have stopped being the real self and I am dreaming. As the dreamer you can read meanings into an event which creates another experience. Thus, there is only one movie but there are billions of perspectives of the same movie. There is only one life but there are infinite perspectives of the one life.

Yesterday on my bus ride home I observed life as my real self. I watched cars, people, shops, wheels, conversations. As the bus drove down a particular street, I saw a man lying in the road and a paramedic over him. I watched a policeman speaking to a man in a taxi nearby. I watched passers-by observing the scene. I watched pedestrians further down the same street oblivious to the accident at the other end. I got of that bus. I waited for another bus. I watched a bunch of cyclists ride by accompanied by a police car. I watched more pedestrians. I got on my bus and watched two passengers sitting opposite me holding hands. I closed my eyes. On my walk home I watched my legs running up and down some stairs. I watched my legs moving faster and faster. I watched houses and trees in the neighbourhood. I opened the front door and said hello to my mother and adjusted myself to the dream of mother and daughter. Being the real self doesn't go down too well with my mother as she thinks I'm ignoring her or upset about something.

Naturally, I am here to experience life and that involves dreaming. You dream what you wish to experience and when it does, you experience it with detachment. You remember not to read meanings into events unless you have to. You also remember that even when you are reading meanings, or dreaming, you do so with detachment. You treat your body as part of the sequence of events. So if you feel a particular sensation, you simply observe it as a dream event and watch it pass. The moment you start to feel and wonder what the sensation is and what the cause is, you're stuck in a dream. A stuck dream can feel very painful indeed.

Life as the real self is very similar to when one is asleep and dreaming, one is not aware of time. For the real self, time is meaningless.

The real self is inexhaustible bliss.

The babies on the bus go waa, waa, waa.
waa, waa, waa.
waa, waa, waa.
The babies on the bus go waa, waa, waa,
all through the town!

The parents on the bus go shh, shh, shh.
shh, shh, shh.
shh, shh, shh.
The parents on the bus go shh, shh, shh,
all through the town!

The mommy on the bus says, I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
The daddy on the bus says, I love you, too,
all through the town. The Wheels on the Bus
With Love,
Enocia